I am feeling very drained off late and have thought so many times to make changes to get back to my previous self. Yes, I am saying the rascal was far better than this sulking energyless idiot!!!
But, man I have disappointed myself time and again. Plans to play baddy daily - no start, plan to go cycling with kiddo - no start, plan to swim - no start, took cult online membership for yoga/exercise - not used once, plan to take care of my biggest regret of music - no progress...I have disappointed myself so much that I do not take myself seriously. Imagine if I am doing this to myself, how many plans I must have not executed at work and in other's life. No wonder I get a feeling that everyone is disappointed with me. I can definitely see it in my boss's face and immediate family.
The best thing was that I always used to come good on promises. I still am the only one who arrives on time for a meeting knowing that most others will be late. Not because I am naive, but because I like to be on time and I respect others' time. I have always been there for people and made extra effort to stay in touch.
Being honest to myself is something I have not been great at and it is getting worse day by day. Time to change it and if I cant, at least be honest to myself and not live a lie!!!
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