Hoʻoponopono is not some crazy shouting that I can do. It is a tried and tested method to deal with situations and your head.
I was doing some reading about guilt and the stress it creates. The inability to deal with it causes immense pain. Guilt is something that can take over your thoughts and make you feel low. It is a toxin that drains the life out of us and makes us do stupid things. Some bad decision or known choices creates regret which left for long can make it toxic. It is normally brushed under the carpet, not allowing us to acknowledge that we did it and made those mistakes.
Recently I have had multiple thoughts of guilt, whether it is a work situation or personal. Like, am I doing a good job or whiling my time away, am I helping out with the household work, am I being a good father, am I a trustworthy friend, am I a good human being who cares about others, etc (I know it is too deep for me). Just the lack of focus and commitment to things has made me stressed for weeks. I end up overthinking and waste further time than taking corrective actions.
I have realized that it can be reduced by acceptance. Yes, I did that and I probably will do that again. Or I might never do it again! It is not easy to bare yourself especially when you have certain ways of thinking, but if you can't be true to yourself, you are in big trouble. Trying to process one thing at a time and coming up with possible options to improve the situation helps. Finding someone who you trust and can discuss could be of immense help. Dealing with it will not fix it overnight but you will feel less stressed about it.
I recently came across Hoʻoponopono (it all starts inside) which is a Hawaiian practice. I would definitely suggest reading about it as it helps develop acceptance and also work on making things better.
We all have certain incompletions in life where we are fearful, not apologizing, not grateful, not expressing love, etc. These simple steps could help deal with it.
Step 1: Repentance – I’M SORRY
This tradition holds that you are responsible for everything in your mind, even if it seems to be “out there.” Once you realize that, it’s very natural to feel sorry. …This realization can be painful, and you will likely resist accepting responsibility for the “out there” kind of problems until you start to practice this method on your more obvious “in here” problems and see results.
So you could choose something that you already know you’ve caused for yourself: Over-weight? Addicted to nicotine, alcohol or some other substance? Do you have anger issues? Health problems? Start there and say you’re sorry. That’s the whole step: I’M SORRY. Underneath you are saying, “I realize that I am responsible for the (issue) in my life and I feel terrible remorse that something in my consciousness has caused this.”
Step 2: Ask Forgiveness – PLEASE FORGIVE ME
Don’t worry about who you’re asking. Just ask! PLEASE FORGIVE ME. Say it over and over. Mean it. Remember your remorse from step 1 as you ask to be forgiven.
Step 3: Gratitude – THANK YOU
Say “THANK YOU” – again it doesn’t really matter who or what you’re thanking. Thank your body for all it does for you. Thank yourself for being the best you can be. Thank God. Thank the Universe. Thank whatever it was that just forgave you. Just keep saying THANK YOU.
Step 4: Love – I LOVE YOU
This can also be step 1. Say I LOVE YOU. Say it to your body, say it to God. Say I LOVE YOU to the air you breathe, to the house that shelters you. Say I LOVE YOU to your challenges. Say it over and over. Mean it. Feel it. There is nothing as powerful as Love.
Cheers to dealing with guilt and stress. Our head deserves good memories and be happy than stress!!!
"There is no path to happiness; happiness is the path." - Buddha
